The Art of Asking: Leap and the Net Appears


“Refusing to ask for help when you need it is refusing someone the chance to be helpful.” ~ Ric Ocasek

Asking for help is not something I do with much ease.

In fact, I find it exceedingly difficult.

I’ve lived on my own now for the better part of 40 years and I never asked for any sort of help for a good chunk of that time. I didn’t have a man around to take care of things (sexist, I know) so I learned to do a lot of things myself.

Add to that, I am stubborn as the day is long. Admitting I don’t have this thing all figured out, is deeply uncomfortable.

I not only haven’t asked for help. I didn’t think I needed to.

And that worked, up to a point.

Then life started to kick my proverbial ass.

Turns out I cannot do everything. I am not a master of all I survey.

I found this out when I fell and broke my face in 2013. Face-planting into solid concrete does that to you.

Then, I received notice I still hadn’t gotten the memo on asking for help, when I fell and broke my wrist last summer.

Whoops. I did it again. I needed help.

I couldn’t even pull up my own pants for eight weeks after I broke my wrist. I couldn’t cook or put on a bra.

In fact, it was difficult to use a fork with my left (non-dominant) hand.


So, what did that foray into helplessness teach me?

It taught me that there’s no shame in needing help. Everyone needs help now and again.


It’s part of the human condition. Sometimes you’ll help me; sometimes, I’ll help you.

It’ll likely even out in the end.

And if it turns out I got the long end of the stick this lifetime, I will likely repay that debt of gratitude in the next go round.

All of this is, I guess, a long-winded way of telling you that yesterday I asked the universe for help. I asked for help in manifesting a trip to an educational conference in Barcelona eight weeks from now. I set up a Go Fund Me to assist me in making this happen. And people have generously started to support me in my quest.

I have to tell you, though, it took every ounce of courage I had to ask for help.

I felt like I was tearing my flesh open and exposing all of my most secret secrets. I thought, who am I to ask for help?

However, it turns out that many of you do not see me as anything other than completely blessed and worthy. You stepped up and said yes to my request and the fundraising began. Since yesterday, I’ve funded approximately 20% of the trip (including the portion my mom threw in the pot).

You did that, right beside me. With me. For me.

And I am profoundly moved and grateful for your support of this dream trip and my work as a writer now and in the future.

You come by, again and again, and read my words.

You fall into Wonderland.

I hope you are encouraged or moved or startled when you do.

I wanted to tell you all this.

I wanted to thank you for being here. I wanted to remind you, you are amazing. I wanted you to know how much you help me. You help me just by stopping by.

I wanted to simply say thank you.


Chip in if you can. Any amount will help and I will be forever grateful for your kindness and support.

Those who chip in will have the option of receiving a free gift from me:

A postcard (or two) while I’m traveling. (First 25 supporters at $5 – $25.)

An original eBook of my writing, created especially for this purpose. ($50 supporters)

All of the above + a personal letter or poem (your choice). ($100 supporter and up. Limited to 15 spots.)

A coaching call with me + all of the above ($250 supporters) (Limited to 3 spots.)

A four-week online course (on Teachable), + all of the above ($500 supporters) (Limited to 5 spots.)

If you interested in an in-person one-day spiritual writing intensive here in Santa Fe, I am planning one for early May. Cost? $75.00.

Email me at if you want additional information on any of these options.


Everyone has a book inside of them. Everyone has a story. Wouldn’t you love to share yours with the world? Get your free writer’s toolkit, packed with tricks and tips to get you started. Just do it. Don’t wait. Don’t die with an untold story inside you.

© 2017  Shavawn M. Berry All rights reserved

Feel free to share this post with others, as long as you include the copyright information and keep the whole posting intact. If you like this piece please share it with others. You can like me on Facebook  or Twitter to see more of my writing and my spiritual journey on my website  at

2 thoughts on “The Art of Asking: Leap and the Net Appears

  1. Shavawn, I sat down to read one post today and ended up reading MANY. I’ve laughed and cried. You’ve tapped into the basics that hit all of us at some time or another. Thanks for writing, and daring and being!

Leave a Reply